We live in a society where honesty, clarity, and seriousness are expected, especially in relationships. And that's why some people consider polygamy to be wrong and suspicious. The idea of a polyamorous relationship can be very different from the standard romance trajectory. That's why from the very beginning, we are taught by our family, society, and people that you should be loyal, committed, serious and honest to your partner. And settle in a monogamous relationship. It is also true that today we live in an era where we think, and talk about the sexual spectrum more openly than ever before. And feel free to try and follow this advice with your partner and friends as well. But the structure of the society around us is such that polygyny, or the practice of having close relationships with more than one partner at a time, still seems a bit taboo and wrong.
What is Polyamory Or Polyamory Relationship?
To put it simply, polyamorous people have relationships, love, and sexual relationships with many people at the same time, which is done intentionally. Polyamory is a type of open or non-monogamous relationship, ranging from a sexual relationship to a relationship of love, emotional attachment, romance, seriousness, or ostentation.
Polyamory specifically refers to people who have had multiple romantic, and sexual, relationships at the same time. This does not mean every type of open relationship, which may involve more casual sexual partners. Or under one plan, many partners make sexual relations among themselves. In many polyamorous relationships, each partner is aware of the other's relationships. At the same time, many people also inspire and encourage their partners in this.
There Are Also A Few Different Types Of Polyamory
- Solo polyamory relationships involve people who do not have a primary partnership but date several people. And they are mostly independent in their personal lives, and this is termed solo polyamory.
- Whereas polyfidelity refers to a relationship or marriage to a group of three or more people who are in a committed relationship with each other and do not date outside the group.
- Hierarchical polygamy includes those who give the most time, attention, and priority to one another. And the secondary and tertiary participants get less time or are not included in the priority that gets less time and attention. At the same time, the primary participant may have more power over important decisions.
- Another polyamory relationship, which is non-hierarchical polygamy, refers to people who do not have a hierarchy of partners. It is also called egalitarian polygamy, or relational anarchy, according to social rhetoric. In this, each partner can receive equal time, love, and attention. So, they may also have similar views and input on important life choices.
What Is The Difference Between Polyamory And Swingers?
Swingers may have multiple sexual partners, as well as may not develop an emotional or romantic relationship with their partner, but may remain completely engrossed in physical relationships. At the same time, those people who are about to change partners, usually attend sex parties and other events to change partners. They can of course have recurring sexual partners, but their focus is not on creating a romantic relationship, instead preferring to remain aloof and unknown after flirting and having a physical relationship.
In contrast, polyamorous people focus on fostering romantic, loving, and emotional relationships. But polyamorists can also be swingers or attend swinger parties and swingers are also sometimes polyamorous. But polyamorists encourage emotional and romantic relationships.
8 Myths And Misconceptions About Polyamory Relationships
Those who think right and wrong, oppose and support will always be present. But the problem is not that the decision to enter into a polyamorous relationship is made with the courtly and enthusiastically consenting adults, rather, with the belief and advice in which we are asked to play, there are many shortcomings and flaws in it, yet we are forced to stick to it or continue on the same path. However, now those attitudes are changing rapidly: an example of this is the survey in 2020. Nearly a third of those surveyed admitted that their ideal relationship was somewhat non-monogamous. And that survey ranks upwards of a fifth of American adults (men and women) under the age of 30 who were active in polyamory in 2016.
Even though polygamy is being talked about, and practiced more in today's times, many people still have plenty of misconceptions, myths, and questions about how it actually works, and whether is it right or is it completely wrong. Those who practice, or are involved in, polygyny struggle against some notions of what it means to be poly.
Hence, in this article, we have talked to relationship experts and people involved in polygamous relationships about poly love and some of the biggest myths and beliefs associated with it, and the results will help you learn more about and understand what it looks like in an ethical polyamorous relationship.
Myth 1: Polyamory Is Mostly Linked To Sex
It is generally easy to accept that the practice of polygamy is only for having sex with many people. After all, even hardcore monogamists can worry, feeling a pang of desire and goodness for others. The first thing that most poly people admit is that they do not engage in polygamy for the sake of sex, or just for the sake of sex. Rather, they are there for love and emotional support. Although an inherently Poly relationship emphasizes a certain openness, which is not achieved in other relationships, it is not the same as a free-for-all. It's about cultivating meaningful, and ongoing relationships with the ability to fall in love. Many people involved in polygamy form what they see as a sort of extended support network, where some, but not all, of the connections, inclinations, and engagements involve a sexual component. And some experts and people say that when I started my journey into polyamory, there was a lot of sex in it, which undoubtedly seemed to take a different form. And what I realized, beyond sex, was friendship as a support system and important family members. And many of the relationships I've had don't have a sexual element at all, but the people who were with us had a deep love, respect, emotional connection, and deep sympathy for each other.
Some people also get involved in polygamy, because they are interested in a romantic relationship without sex, and expect to be emotionally attached to multiple people at once. Many people in the polygamous community identify as asexual. And they find polyamory attractive because they can still have an emotional, romantic, sensitive thinking and connection. Or many relationships or even their partners are not forced to be asexual or celibate.
Myth 2: Polyamorous Relationships Are Only For People Who Don't Want To Be In A Relationship Or Commit To A Single Partner
The ethical and traditional relationship is guided by customs that we should stick to ourselves in a relationship of honesty and loyalty, and not go out of relationships. And most of your attention, affection, love, and sweet loyal relationships should be directed toward the other. But if you've ever struggled to squeeze in that special someone of yours, you can probably appreciate how complicated it can be. Because the number of relationships you are building is expanding. This is, in fact, one of the major challenges of engaging in a polygamous life, which most people try to manage through good communication. However, it is a clear effort to balance the needs and wants of multiple partners, and shared time for practicality.
Myth 3: Polygamy May Not Work In The Long Run
The idea behind this is also interesting. Those people who think so are because of the jealous nature of man. Still, many people believe that poly people are above feeling jealous and that their broad thinking makes them great. The main difference, however, is that poly people prefer to respond to feelings of jealousy with openness and curiosity rather than shame. And the truth is, that polyamorous people tend to think differently than jealous. Every person in society who is familiar with the term polyamorist naturally comes to mind what it is like to be an ideal poly person. And it simply means that you never feel jealous, and you're always perfectly happy knowing about your partner's polyamorous relationships, possibly even supporting them. And that is not realistic to happen. The human heart is fickle, which enjoys and feels things strongly. Maybe he prefers to be emotionally attached to multiple people.
Myth 4: Just As Polygamy Isn't Just About Sex, It's Not About Group Sex Either
It cannot be denied that group sex is mutually consensual, which under certain circumstances is also group sex in some relationships. But there are a lot of poly people who never have group sex, and don't like to get into group sex. In addition, group sex doesn't get out of control, nor are their partner-swapping crushes during sex, as we often find in porn or other adult things. It is also worth noting that most of the more intense sexual contact is between the members of a couple, and things are usually associated with touching or kissing between couples, or couples receiving it with their normal and trusting partners.
Myth 5: Polyamory Is For Relationship Commitment Phobia
This is a completely wrong notion. Because most poly people are not poly, the truth is that they are afraid to settle down with a serious relationship. Many partners don't have a commitment to the relationship, many poly people live happily without any problems, even if they don't live under one roof, and come together for a while.
Myth 6: Poly People Have A Higher Risk Of Getting STIs Or Other Sexual Infections
This is completely wrong in today's society. Because most of us have been in more than one relationship at one time or another, or have had physical relations with more than one person. Having sex with many different partners can be risky, whether you are in a polyamorous relationship or not. Sometimes people who maintain moral relationships are also victims of sexual infection. But polyamorists play it safe, they show genuine commitment and honesty to it. Every polyamory knows that they are in a relationship with multiple people, so safe sex is the biggest authenticity of this relationship. And all those partners are bound by various agreements and protocols, use safe sex practices, and regularly undergo STI testing.
Myth 7: People With Polygamous Views Never Get Emotionally Attached To Anyone
People who engage in polyandry use the term polyandry to describe the love, affection, compassion, and possibility that they tend to have multiple partners in their lives. So the downside is that emotional attachment and love for more or more people can also mean more chances of heartbreak, which makes the mentally weak. With a lot of love, there is also a lot of pain associated with it. It doesn't matter how well you communicate with the partner in the relationship, no matter how mean you are in meeting the needs and wants of your partners, or how strong your connection is, some things just happen. People with polygamous views or those involved have a complete emotional connection and are also serious and loyal to partners.
Myth 7. Poly People Tend To Be Dissatisfied
When a person leaves a relationship in search of sex, it is natural to assume that something is lacking in the romance between the couple, or that the person is sexually dissatisfied. But this does not seem to be the case for polygamous individuals or those involved.
A professor of psychology from an American institution and a university affiliated with a prestigious Canadian institution studied about 2000 people who were involved in polygamous relationships. All participants were asked to list one primary partner and one secondary partner, or even more. And the results weren't surprising, as they seemed to have an emotional connection. And there was no such thing as greed for sex or excess of sex, and dissatisfaction with them. They also found that those in the study felt more satisfied, closer, and more supported than their primary partner. And their desire for a secondary or other partner had little to do with dissatisfaction in the relationship. So it is an exception and wrong to say that poly people are sexually dissatisfied. Some have reality behind having relationships with more people, some even want more love, and some expect emotional attachment and think it will bring more love.
Polyamorous relationships are relatively independent of each other. We believe in our society and culture that if your needs are met outside of your relationship, that could have some kind of harmful effect, and that's not what we find here. There is no evidence or study result to dispute or disprove that polyandry is wrong. Honesty is your biggest happiness and strong link, no matter what relationship you are in.